Recent Activity

  • Natalie shared from How To Write A Non-fiction Book In 60 Days by Paul Lima
    - Efficient writers spend 40 per cent of their time planning (preparation, research, and organization), 25 per cent of their time writing, and 35 per cent of their time revising. - Less efficient writers spend more time overall on projects and distribute their time differently: 20 per cent planning, 60 per cent writing (tinkering, writing, tinkering...), and 20 per cent revising, tinkering, revising. In addition to spending more time overall on projects, less efficient writers tend to be less satisfied with the results.
    Note: The difference between proficient writers and amateurs. How do you divide your time when writing?
  • Natalie shared from Healing the Shame that Binds You: Recovery Classics Edition by John Bradshaw
    Unconditional love of myself means that I love all of me, my strengths and my weaknesses, my successes and my failures. I love myself in my perfectly imperfect humanity. Unconditional self-love is rooted in healthy shame as the permission to be human. Healthy shame is about polarity, not polarization. All humans are both/and rather than either/or. We have our goodness mixed with our badness. We are never all good or all bad. When I’m loving all of me, all of my perfectly imperfect self, I become whole. When I love myself unconditionally, I have the potential to love others unconditionally. Knowing...
    Note: Do you love all of you unconditionally? What's hard to love in yourself? What's hard to love in others ?
  • Natalie shared from Healing the Shame that Binds You: Recovery Classics Edition by John Bradshaw
    Empathetically view each of your despised and disdained parts. They represent the shadow side of your consciousness. The more you avoid thinking about these parts of yourself, the more they become unconscious. The more unconscious they are, the more you will project them on others by criticizing, blaming and judging. This keeps you alienated from others. The more you accept the unwanted parts of yourself, the more you become one with yourself and become rigorously honest with yourself. Rigorous honesty with yourself allows you to be whole.
    Note: Love all the shadow...
  • Natalie shared from Healing the Shame that Binds You: Recovery Classics Edition by John Bradshaw
    OWNING MY DISTORTED BEHAVIORS My precious Inner Child is beautiful, but he was wounded by carried and induced shame. My shame-based self did many things I’m not proud of and that I feel genuine guilt about. My conscience calls me to be aware of the immoral things I’ve done. Those behaviors are part of me, and I can’t be whole if I try to block them out. The psychologist Sheldon Kopp writes, “I cannot rid myself of my demons without risking that my angels will flee along with them.
    Note: Is there something you feel ashamed about?
  • Natalie shared from Healing the Shame that Binds You: Recovery Classics Edition by John Bradshaw
    Slavin and Kriegman write: Repression allows the reality of the true self to be put out of consciousness and to be held in reserve so that it can be allowed to reenter the child’s repertoire when conditions change and the need for repression is lessened and can be retrieved, as the child’s true self is needed to fulfill his or her unique interest and destiny.
    Note: Repression and it's gift to the True Self:
  • Natalie shared from Healing the Shame that Binds You: Recovery Classics Edition by John Bradshaw
    Thomas Moore comments on the fact that everything in life suffers when our vision of it is too small. “Sex,” he writes, “is the religion of marriage. It is its contemplation, its ritual, its prayer and its communion.” And in another place, commenting on spiritual depths in sexuality, Moore says, “Sex purifies. In various stages of mutual generosity . . . gazing, touching and being touched, the individuals lose defendedness and discover what it means to be present in another, body and
  • Natalie shared from Healing the Shame that Binds You: Recovery Classics Edition by John Bradshaw
    remember that your internalized shame resulted from your childhood abandonments. Your worst fear (rejection) has already happened and you survived it. You were a needy, vulnerable and immature child and you survived. Wow! You can and will survive again.
  • Natalie shared from Healing the Shame that Binds You: Recovery Classics Edition by John Bradshaw
    Intimacy requires the ability to be vulnerable. To be intimate is to risk exposing our inner selves to each other, to bare our deepest feelings, desires and thoughts. To be intimate is to be the very ones we are and to love and accept each other unconditionally. This requires self-confidence and courage. Such courage creates a new space in our relationship. That space is not yours or mine; it is ours.
    Note: Intimacy takes risking... How risky are you?
  • Natalie shared from Healing the Shame that Binds You: Recovery Classics Edition by John Bradshaw
    If you’re willing to love and accept yourself unconditionally, you will allow yourself time to just be. You will set aside times when there’s nothing you have to do and nowhere you have to go. You will allow yourself solitude, a nourishing time of aloneness. You will take time for hygiene and exercise. You will take time for fun and entertainment. You will take vacations. You will take time to work at your sex life. You will be willing to give yourself pleasure and enjoyment. The work of love is the work of listening to yourself. You listen to yourself by monitoring your feelings, needs and...
    Note: Are you a high achiever? Do you love yourself?
  • Natalie shared from Healing the Shame that Binds You: Recovery Classics Edition by John Bradshaw
    Own your own healthy shame. If you’re always right, you stop listening and learning. The key to overcoming being right is to become an active listener. Carl Rogers did pioneering work in developing this skill. As an active listener you listen for content as well as process. You learn to listen with your eyes as well as your ears. You learn to give feedback and check things out. By listening and clarifying we learn to see things as another person sees them. The checking-out process helps us grasp the other’s point of view. It is important to remember that others believe what they are saying...
    Note: If you are often Right... Read this...
(East Sussex, United Kingdom)
Natalie Lamb